WORK RELATIONSHIPS: HOW CLOSE IS TOO CLOSE


MY WOES
When on a job, we tend to spend about 80 percent of our day with our co-workers and 20 percent with our families. Because we are around our co-workers for long hours of the day, they tend to become our second family. We began to confine in each other, building trust worthy relationship, and sharing life journeys.
If you are lucky enough to bond, enjoy spending and sharing so much time and personal information with the people you work with daily, sometimes can become beneficial to your everyday life. Rare occasions this can be ideal. Like the perfect place to work. Caring for each other, having each others back, not worrying if I share this tad bit of information everyone will not find out what I am going through and so on.
This group of co-workers are like family. We may bicker amongst ourselves and that is as far as it goes. We resolve it and move forward. At the end of the day you need your job and so do I, lets work this through and be a family again. I have your back no matter what. This group of co-workers are function well and value each other despite the disagreements.
NO NEW FRIENDS
The second group are more of a "No Friends/Family" zone. Although no one is out to get each other, no one wants the ties of establishing work/ personal relationships. No commitments. Let's all come in here work as a team and get the job done and go home. All professional on and off the floor.
No one really knows what's going on in the other's personal life. Very little is shared. One may share a pregnancy which would be obvious, engagement and or loss. This group is straight to the point or the occasion, no details, not much from the past or present and even future is shared.
This group don't really depend on the other for support but will give it without question and are genuinely positive and supportive if one decides to share something brief about themselves. Not too many "why" questions are asked as to why something happened. It's just straight to the point, what would be valuable to help the outcome. This group is more common now a days. What happened at work stays at work unless there is a life changing event that occurs in a co-worker's life. This group can be very motivational as well because they don't feed off negativity, they always reach for the positive side of an obstacle to continue to push you forward.
US VERSUS THEM
Let's just start by saying "the messy bunch". Everyone is usually for self. This group tend to leave co-workers hanging in desperate times and quick to blame others. A big factor in this group is no one pulls their own weight. With that being said, these traits tend to lead to clicks, blaming, he said she said and holding long term grudges.
This group is very uncomfortable to work with. A new employee probably wouldn't last long in this bunch. One, as a new employee you may pick up on vibes and immediately began to look for a new company or department to work in. Two, because you took to one side, the others may feel threaten and began to cause problems.
This group is usually very unorganized, doesn't manage time well, becomes very defensive even in non conflicting situations, and DO NOT communicate well. No one usually wants to work harder than the next. The mindset at of a typical person in this group is in a negative place from the start of shift.
This group also tend to go through a lot of managerial changes in hopes to fix the team building issues. What usually happens, depending on the will of the manager, the manager will get sucked in and the bickering will continue with the manager having a bitter taste in character over the staff and eventually leaving. A manager who has a great managerial background, well rounded in team building and communication and not moved by personal opinions and feeling will be ideal to get this group moving in a positive direction.
The only things that will fix this group of co-workers is just straight hashing out the bottom issue and truly being honest. Mixing up the department and eventually applying some team building activities to restore trust and work relationships. Also you will have to separate the personal from professional.
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT
You never want to end up with a group of co-workers that make your everyday job a nightmare. No one deserves to feel as if they are not valued, appreciated, or miserable on a job that everyone has their own responsibilities and were hired to help a company flourish and allow you to grow through the company to new levels. Especially if it's your dream job. Besides this is where you will spend most of your time and energy.
So how close is too close of a relationship to have with your colleagues? What category would your current position fall in now? Do you think it's motivating you to grow within your team or do you feel discouraged? Are you able to give feedback to help changes within the department better for yourself and your team? Do you all collaborate effectively for the better of the customer? Do personal feelings affect the dynamic of the work environment? Do you find yourself having many whoosaahh moments because of the stress and frustration from your co-workers?
You have to have work-life balance, great and effective communication. If something becomes personal learn to talk it out even if that mean setting up a meeting with the other party and manager. Never bring personal conflicts into work. Learn to leave it at the door. Remember you are here to learn, grow and not stay in the same position as you started.
Always lead and never follow.... be the change.